Wed have to make more of an effort to pul ourselves from our blissful bubble of there being no one else in the world except for us.
It seems we real y know how to clear a room, Wil iam said, scanning the room with me. Ready to move on to the next place?
If we have to, I sighed, al owing him to lead me from the dance floor we hadnt left since our Betrothal was announced.
My sentiments exactly, he grinned back at me, nodding over to Max. Wel be at Cora and Josephs for the remainder of the night.
Means of transportation, Max listed off, keeping stride beside Wil iam, somehow managing to make a six foot three man that was muscled to perfection look like a shrimp. I had to give the Council credit for attaching the biggest, scariest, stone-faced guards to Wil iam they could . . . and I guess I had to give them credit now for our Betrothal.
Wil iam shrugged. Foot? He looked back at me, seeking approval.
Moonlit walk with my Betrothed . . . and five guards in tow? Thats the stuff romance is made of right there, I teased, snickering when he tried to give me his sternest look.
Youve turned into quite the comedian, Wil iam said as we left the tent, five figures ghosting into position around us, far enough away to grant us a semblance of privacy, but close enough to be effective if need be.
It was reassuring having them there and even more reassuring knowing they were there when I wasnt, but I was the deadliest thing in our party of seven, not to mention my protection of him stemmed from love rather than duty. If anyone was foolish enough to attack Wil iam when I was around, they were certifiably insane, because doing so in my presence was like signing your own death certificate. I didnt value life so little I was eager to deal out death, it was just that I valued his life so much death was overshadowed by it.
So turning into a regular wisenheimer means youve been spending too much time with Patrick again. I knew Wil iams tones wel enough to know he was only teasing, but he also knew my tones.
So when I replied, Hardly, in my high-pitched voice, accompanied with staring straight ahead, he knew hed struck a chord.
Busted, he said, not pretending to ignore my tel as I hoped he would. What are you not tel ing me? Something having to do with Patrick?
My eyes stayed forward when I answered. Hes the buzzing mosquito in the ear of Immortality. Not to mention a serious pain in my butt, I mumbled.
Nice try, Wil iam said, wrapping his arm around me as we meandered into the night. And high marks for trying to distract me from my topic of seriousness.
I learned from the best”this time I looked over at him with accusing eyes”and I took real y good notes.
I can see that, he said but you cant distract a distracter. So time to fess up. What do you know about Patrick that I dont?
I wrapped my arms around myself, sliding into the crux of his arm like I was cold. I shouldnt have been cold, but I felt cold. Um, I dont real y know what to say . . . I began, knowing I couldnt keep this from him, but not knowing when or how to phrase it, or where to begin.
How about with the truth? he offered simply, like the truth was the simplest solution to anything, and for him, I knew it was, but for me, things had always been more complicated.
The truth, I repeated to myself, the last thing I wanted to be divulging to him tonight, but I knew the last thing was usual y the way every situation I was involved in resulted in. Like I was the final stroke of black marring an exquisite painting.
Wil iam waited, his patience unwavering. After a few more internal grumbles, I resigned myself to the truth. Im worried about him, I began, trying to ease our way into it. Hes been acting strange lately”Wil iam shot me a look”wel , stranger than usual.
Wil iam nodded. Ive noticed the same thing, too. Any idea why? he asked, straight to the point, just his style.
Months of Patrick-quipping experience answered, He realized he just went through the entire planets population of women and hes going to have to start at the beginning again.
Good observation, Wil iam answered, trying to look serious. But I think my womanizing brothers ways are ending because hes found . . .”he looked at me, his eyes happy”the one.
I stumbled over a non-existent impediment in my path. Wil iam caught me like he was always ready for my grace to make its appearance. Why do you think that? I asked, clearing my throat mid-way through.
A hundred smal reasons and one big one, he answered, spinning in front of me and leading me through the fields with his back to the world.
Oh, yeah? I said, giving indifference a try.
He erased his black book of phone numbers”that was legendary, by the way”and wont take a cal if a girl cal s. I mean, did you see him tonight?
He wouldnt even look at one. The only one I saw him with was you, Wil iam said, the lightness in his face tel ing me he didnt suspect anything. Hes not eating, hes not sleeping, and hes taken to writing poetry. The mushy, sappy kind that goes down in history.
It should have made tel ing Wil iam that much easier since hed opened the door for me, but it made it harder. I could see he was happy, excited even, that his brother had shunned the Immortal way like his big brother and fal en for someone before he was granted permission, but I knew the happy would drain from his expression the moment after I told him who the girl was.
And the big reason? I asked, delaying, but I couldnt much longer. The lights from Joseph and Coras place were glowing in the distance.
Wil iam shrugged. Hes got that tortured look in his eyes of a man thats in love in the kind of way that could break him.
Guilt like lava flowed over me. How do you know that? I said, trying to imply he was over exaggerating.
I lived that look for two hundred years, he said, his eyes showing me what he was talking about. It was heart-breaking in a beautiful way. Im stil living that look.
Forever now, I said, smiling through the moment. Nothing, not even dodging around the truth of Patrick professing his love to me, could extinguish the reminder of Wil iam and my Betrothal.
Thats right, he said affectionately. I never knew torture could feel so good.
I laughed as he swept open the picket fence sweeping around Joseph and Coras.
So? he asked expectantly, reaching for my wrist and pul ing me to a stop.
I sighed, realizing if tonight was the last time Id see him until our Unity”my stomach dropped at the thought”there was no other time to tel him than now. I couldnt Unite with Wil iam with this huge of a weight hanging on my shoulders.
I spun to him, forcing my eyes to look into his. I think I know who that girl is.
You do? he whispered. Who?
CHAPTER EIGHT
SECRETS AND SURFING
I sighed, squeezing Wil iams hand as a preemptive form of comfort. Im pretty sure that girl is m” Here they are! a voice shouted the instant the front door slammed open. He hurried down the steps, hooked an arm around Wil iams and my necks, and led us into the house. You guys kept us waiting long enough. We almost sent out the cavalry, Patrick said, scanning the guards positioning around the outside of the house. Wel , a second cavalry.
Hope I didnt interrupt anything too important, Patrick said, keeping his voice light as we stepped through the door.
Not real y, Wil iam said, throwing a play punch into Patricks ribs. We were only talking about you, after al .
Oh, yeah? Patrick asked. What were you talking about? He gave me a quick look, the arm over my neck squeezing.
Hey, the near newlyweds decided to final y grace us with their presence, Joseph cal ed out from behind his guitar.
Wil iam weaved out of Patricks arm as he turned to him. Later, he said, but I expect a ful disclosure. He tried sounding stern, but he was so happy for his brother it was impossible.
Super, Patrick muttered as Wil iam retrieved his guitar from Cora. Ive got to borrow Bryn for a moment, brother, Patrick cal ed out, pul ing my arm in the opposite direction of where I was headed. I need a little help in the kitchen.
You need more than just a little help, Wil iam joked, fingers strumming against the guitar strings.
Dont I know it, Patrick said under his breath, picking up his pace when we entered the hal . Emerging into the kitchen, he turned on me. You were about to tel him, werent you? His voice was low, but I couldnt tel if it was from anger or hurt.
Yes, I whispered, glancing towards the hal .
Are you trying to get me kil ed? He took a step into me, too close for comfort given tonights professions.
I took a step back. Stop being so dramatic, Patrick. Hes not going to kil you.
Thats what Id do if some loser told my girl he loved her. His eyes fel and this time he took a step away from me, and another, until he turned his back on me and opened the refrigerator.
Wel , thats not what he would do, I said, pul ing out Coras dessert plates as Patrick pul ed a triple layer red velvet cake from the fridge.
Yeah, believe me, I know how perfect my brother is and how much you love him for said perfection and how Im the polar opposite of him. He half-slammed the cake down on the counter.
Thats not what I meant, Patrick, I replied, distracting myself by counting out seven forks.
I know, he sighed, bracing his arms into the counter, letting his head fal between them. Dont mind me. Im just the guy who watched the girl he loves be promised to someone else.
A mixture of emotions hit me watching Patrick reduced to this crumpled form: guilt for being the cause of it, grief for his love going unrequited, and anger towards him for fal ing for me when he knew the way Wil iam felt.
Knowing from experience that anger had a way of overshadowing every other emotion, I knew that would be the one to reply. I thought you were one of the few that supported Wil iam through everything he went through finding me, you helped him find me at times for goodness sake,”Patrick waved his hands up and down, hinting I should lower my volume”but now, because youre mistaking some errant crush as love, youre al put out because he succeeded?
Errant crush? Patrick repeated, his ears going red. Put out? Did you real y not hear a thing I said to you tonight?
I heard everything, Patrick, I answered, bringing my hands to my chest. But what do you expect me to do? Or say? I love Wil iam, I emphasized, wondering if I repeated it enough if it could chase away his feelings for me.
Supremely aware of that. Thanks for the reminder. He looked down at his chest, feeling around the sternum area. If youre done pulverizing my heart, mind handing it back over?
I glowered at him before turning my back to him.
I dont expect you to say or do anything. I know you love him, unconditional y, and thats the way it should be because, as much as I love you and want to spend my life with you, Id rather kil myself than hurt my brother that way, he said, the theatricality gone from his voice. But what do you expect me to do? You cant control who you love, as much as I wish I could. I wish I could look at you like every other girl, a chal enge to conquer and enjoy until Im bored a few minutes later, but I cant, he confessed, undoing his bowtie and sliding it free of his col ar. I see the future I want, but Il never have when I look at you. I see contentment and meaning and passion when I look into your eyes. I feel betrayal and disloyalty to my brother when I look at you the way I am now, he said, his eyes taking me in like they had been for awhile, but Id not paid any attention to the intensity in them until I was made aware of it. Ive tried and tried to look at you like youre no one, but I cant. So please, just tel me, what do you want me to do?
Everything from his expression, his posture, and his voice was desperate and, as much as I knew he needed more from me, I knew Wil iam would come looking for me soon.