He didn't press her up against his body this time. Instead, she was totally immobilized by his strength. She'd known he was in great shape, that his muscles were cut and ripped, but now that she was getting to know the feel of his hands on her, the truth was he was so much stronger than she'd thought.
“How many times have you done it?”
Looking up at his beautiful face, she got snared in his green eyes, and any chance she had of speaking was lost.
“Tell me, damn you. How many three-ways have you had?”
Forcing her brain to process his gritty request, she finally got out, “None.”
His eyes flashed with relief a split second before wariness—and disbelief—took over. His hands tightened on her shoulders again. “Don't lie to me.”
Okay, now that just made her mad. How dare he accuse her of lying!
Going on her tippy toes so that her face was barely an inch from his, she spoke each word distinctly. “I. Don't. Lie.”
She always told the truth. Even when it hurt. Even when it would be so much better to spin out an easy lie.
There was a heavy pause where his eyes held hers and she thought he was going to kiss her again. She held her breath waiting for it.
Instead he said, “You were going to do it. Tonight.”
She was surprised to see more than anger in his gaze. There was jealousy there, too. And concern. Had he actually been afraid for her safety?
A part of her wanted to push out of his arms and defend herself and tell him that she'd gotten out of far stickier situations with no problems. But another part—the part that had needed Luke for too damn long—had her moving closer to him and saying, “I was just about to send them home, Luke. I thought I could do it. I thought I wanted to do it. But I didn't. I couldn't.”
How could I enjoy having a three-way with a couple of strangers when the only person I really want is you?
Chapter Three
Janica Ellis was one of the most vibrant, self-confident, overtly sexual women he’d ever met. Even though she was only five years younger than he was, she'd always struck him as too young. Too raw. Way too out in the open. He didn't date girls like her, didn't see the point when it was clear that there was no future in it.
As he held her body close to his, Luke had to wonder how Janica and Lily could possibly be related. Because even though they looked nothing like each other—Lily was tall and curvy and soft with flowing red curls while Janica was small, all angles and lines with jet black hair—their differences stretched far beyond the physical.
Lily, Luke’s best friend from elementary school, was the most giving, caring, loyal person he’d ever known.
Whereas everything about Janica screamed TAKE.
And yet, she was the only person he could face tonight. Was it because she was the only person he knew who wouldn't judge him—or feel a speck of pity—over the fact that his world was imploding?
Or, he had to ask himself, still tasting her sweetness on his lips, was it simply about sex?
Hot, sweaty, slippery sex.
From the moment his lips had touched hers, his dick had been rock hard. It was sick for his sister-in-law, someone he'd known since she was in pigtails – and had told himself he didn't much liked - to give him a woody. Lord knew that was what he’d been telling himself for the past five years. But none of that mattered right now.
He was sick of being the good guy all the time. He was exhausted from fighting his desire for Janica. And he was done not taking what she gave so freely to anyone else with a heartbeat.
Sick. And getting sicker by the second. He knew it. And on any other night he would have fought against his baser urges, the way he usually did. He would have put nobility first and lust second. But he was too tired, too burnt out, too skeptical about the whole damn world and his part in it to bring himself to care, to stop the train he was on before it slammed into a brick wall.
A beautiful, erotic brick wall.
His cock shot up another inch beneath the zipper of his jeans as he drank her in, forcing everything that had happened in the ER out of his head.
Watching him watch her, Janica's eyes flashed a mixture of confusion and desire. And then, in a flash, the uncertainty disappeared, replaced with her usual feisty attitude.
He held her challenging gaze, silently acknowledging that they hadn’t had an easy relationship since their siblings got married. They’d been forced together for countless lunches, dinners, and holidays, and the truth was he'd never gone out of his way to be particularly nice to her. Not when he'd made up his mind about Janica years ago in defense of his best friend, Lily, deciding that Janica was a selfish little girl who took everything she could from her older sister and rarely gave anything back.
A voice in the back of his head said, Are you sure that's why you stayed away from her? Or were you afraid that if you ever let yourself have a taste of heaven, you wouldn't be able to pull yourself away from her? Because you just might find out that you like her more than you want to.
What the hell was wrong with him tonight? Why was his brain playing tricks on him?
He needed to shut off the voice of reason that said to get the fuck out while he still had his pants on and stick with the plan. What had happened in the trauma center tonight had made him a different man. One he wasn’t sure he’d like in the morning, but one who knew exactly what he wanted.
Janica.
He wanted her more than he’d ever wanted anyone, or anything, his whole life.
For the first time in thirty-five years he was completely lacking in moral fiber. But what did it really matter in the end? His twin, Travis, had been the biggest dog Luke knew. And even though he'd simply used women for their bodies, disrespecting their feelings all the while, he’d found true love with Lily anyway. Now he had a wife. Kids. A family.
Travis had real happiness.
What had being the good guy ever gotten Luke?
A couple of “perfect” girlfriends that he hadn't been able to fall in love with, no matter how hard he tried. And a job that was slowly killing him.
The dark side reeled him in and he no longer bothered trying to resist.
“Everything’s different tonight,” he told Janica and when she simply said, “Yes,” then kissed him, her mouth on his was all it took to seal his deal with the devil.
Luke Carson's saint days were through.
Chapter Four
Janica couldn't get enough of Luke.
She could feel the warmth of his skin beneath his clothes as her hands roamed down his back, then back up and across his broad, muscular shoulders, but it wasn't good enough. She wanted to know the feel of him beneath her fingertips.