Home > Breathe into Me(32)

Breathe into Me(32)
Author: Sara Fawkes

I rolled my eyes at him. “Cocky much?”

Slinging his arm around my shoulder he shrugged. “Nah. Just confident.”

We made our way to class after class. Kane always walking me to them, and waiting for me after. We were always touching each other in some way on the walks. Whether it be holding hands, or his arm around my shoulders and mine around his waist. I caught a few dirty looks from some girls and noticed some of the guys checking us out. I know what they were all thinking. What was Kane doing with her?

Lunch was pretty much uneventful. Kane had me go ahead and take a seat at the table while he went and filled a try for us. Surprisingly, he actually picked out food that I would eat.

“How did you know what I would want?” I raised my brow at him.

Shrugging, he said, “I got what sounded good, and honestly you don’t really eat like a girl, remember? You kinda eat like a dude, so I got what I would eat.”

I laughed at the memory of that first lunch day. I guess he was right, I did kind of eat like a guy.

After lunch, Jessi and Landon actually fell into step with Kane and me on the way to class. Jess kept sending me secret looks that screamed ‘Oh mah God! So cute.’ Which earned her a death glare from me. Kane and Landon talked about some big game that was happening this weekend, but sports were the one thing you would find me completely girly about. I didn’t understand them and I didn’t try to. Every time I tried to watch football I ended up losing the ball in all the commotion and just cheered when my section would cheer.

When we made it to the door to my class, Kane stopped and glanced inside before scooping me up in his arms, deeply kissing me. By the time he was done, I was a little kiss drunk and couldn’t even find the words to tell him goodbye. I just stood there feeling like my head was surrounded by tiny stars and swirls, like those old cartoons when the characters would get bumped on the head. When I finally gathered my composure I entered the class and went right to my seat.

“Well, well, well. You two seem to be pretty cozy.” Jessi’s voice called to me and I turned in my seat too look at her. She had her chin perched on her fist and was batting her lashes at me.

“Hush,” I mumbled.

“What? I’m just stating the obvious. I have never even seen you kiss anyone since, what, freshman year when you kissed Walker Philips at Katy Allen’s pool party?”

I gasped and leaned closer to her. “You said you would never bring that up again! You know he pretty much assaulted me. Practically licking my entire face in the process!”

I cringed from the memory. Jessi had begged me go to that party. Before everything had happened with my mom, Jessi, Katy, and I used to have sleepovers every other weekend. A few nights before the party when her and her parents thought I was sleeping, I overheard them talking down the hall from my room.

They were talking about how they were worried about me. How since my mother’s death I was secluding myself and I was holding in all my grief because I wouldn’t talk about that night with anyone. Not them, not Jessi, and not the stupid therapist everyone said I should see.

I didn’t want to relive that night, and every time I talked about it … I did. Every time I closed my eyes I saw my mother’s cold blank stare and her purple lips gasping for air. No, living through it once was enough. I would talk about that night as little as humanly possible for the rest of my life. But the next day when Jessi asked me to go with her to the party, I had agreed so maybe they would stop worrying.

I was sitting there, contemplating leaving early when Walker came over to talk to me. I was a little surprised he’d done so because this was around the time that people began to pull away from me. I was sitting on one of the lounge chairs in the back of the pool area picking at the pink polish on my nails when I felt a body plop down beside me. I thought it was Jessi at first but was met with the slight smell of alcohol and Walker’s lopsided grin.

“How’s it going, Kelsey? Haven’t seen you around much lately.”

“I’m at school every day, Walker. Just like you.”

I was trying to play nice and converse with him, but in all actuality I was annoyed. It had been months since he had even attempted to speak to me and now that he had a few beers in his system, he decided it was a good time to approach me?

“Yeah, but you’re not the same you that you were before.”

I glared at him. He had no idea how I was not the same me that I was before.

He placed his clammy hand on the bare skin of my thigh just below my shorts. I tried shaking off his hand but his sticky palm wouldn’t budge.

“Remember how it used be, Kel? Remember when you were dying to … oh shit. Maybe I shouldn’t have used that word.”

I had heard enough. I loved Jessi and her parents, but I couldn’t put up with this or these people for another second. I quickly got up, but when I tried to step around Walker’s legs he grabbed my wrist and tugged me down onto his lap.

“Oh come on, Kel, you know I didn’t mean it that way. All I’m trying to say is before all that went down, I was going to ask you to be my girlfriend.”

“Walker, believe me when I say this. You may have been planning on asking me to be your girlfriend, but you are quick to forget … that doesn’t mean I would have said yes.”

I made a move to stand again but he held firm to my waist and covered the bottom half of my face with his open mouth. It only took him about a minute to realize he was making out with my chin and by that time the damage was done. Someone saw us and yelled, “Kelsey and Walker is getting it on!”

I never thought I would live that day down. Thankfully, shortly after that is when everyone decided to avoid me like the plague and it was never spoken of again. Well, other than when Jessi would have a horrific make out experience and would always refer it to a “Walker Wash.”

“I know, I know. I couldn’t resist!” she laughed and held up both of her hands.

I huffed and turned around in my seat, vowing I would give her a silent treatment for the rest of class. We were still waiting on Professor Hanson to come out of her office when Nate knelt down on the other side of my desk.

“Hey,” he said with a nod. “When is the next study session? I’ve got a busy week and I just wanted to make sure that it wouldn’t fall on a day that I have something planned.”

“Oh, um, I think Jessi is pretty busy this week too. I’m free whenever though. So why don’t you just text me and we will work something out?”

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