“I have lived this life since I was born, so I know how to navigate through it. You are but a babe amongst the wolves. I understand how royalty and politicians think. I know the captains of industry. I am a wonderful hostess. I will be an exemplary royal wife and a Queen our countries will be proud of. I am the wife that Alex needs.”
I am listening. The pain is gathering within me, filling my heart to bursting proportions, but I’m listening.
“Additionally, I understand your concerns. I understand that you may not wish to give up the love of your life so easily. I do not wish you to be compromised when you return to Chicago, seeing the notoriety that you’ve generated. So I’m going to offer you a deal. I understand that your mother is facing financial hardship.”
My eyes narrow.
“If you go back to Chicago – first class, all expenses paid – I am willing to offer you three million US dollars. That will set you and your mother back for life. You needn’t work a day any longer, unless you wish to.”
Her eyes brim with emotion.
“Take it, Elizabeth Turner. Do it for Alex and yourself. This offer may not last forever. If you take it now, you will be three million dollars richer. You are free to start your life again in any way you see fit. But if he dumps you down the line, which he inevitably will because he must bow to royal pressure, you and your mother will have nothing. You will have to go back to America penniless, and with your name besmirched.”
Chapter Ten
I wander through the next few days in a daze. I told Tatiana I needed to think about it, of course, and she agreed.
Everything she says is true. She has the class, the pedigree, the money, the breeding to be a Queen.
On paper, I can bring nothing to Alex. I have no money, no honored family name. By being with him, I have only brought him strife with his family and people.
I am no good for him. If I love him, I should leave him.
And I do love him. I love him so very, very much.
Do I love him enough to leave him?
The question … and decision … hangs above my head like a proverbial sword.
Alex notices my pensiveness.
“Hey, did you see the papers today?” he says, trying to cheer me up, incorrectly thinking that I’m still affected by bad press. “The tide is turning. Your former employer, Mr. Mango or something … ”
“Mr. Mangorean,” I correct him gently.
“Yes, that’s the one. He says you have always been an exemplary employee. Always punctual, always meticulous, ready to take one for the team if someone calls in sick.”
I smile despite myself. It’s nice to know that not everyone thinks I’m a douchebag.
Alex takes my face in his hands and kisses my forehead. “Hey, I’m in this with you, remember? Us against the world?”
I nod, melting into his warmth. I hug his waist in return.
Oh Alex. It doesn’t have to be you against the world. You don’t have to do this for me.
I think I have already made my decision.
I’m making it because I love Alex more than anything else in my life.
*
I take a deep breath as I dial Tatiana’s private number on my cellphone. She picks it up on first ring.
“Elizabeth?”
“I’ll leave for Chicago.”
There’s a palpable relief on the other side of the phone.
“Wise choice. Text me your bank account number. The money will be transferred to you as soon as you touch down in Chicago, you’ll have my word. The condition is that you will never attempt to contact Alex again or reciprocate if he attempts to contact you.”
“I don’t want the money.”
There’s an astonished silence.
“What did you say?”
“I said I don’t want the money.”
I pause. Somewhere down the line, someone is going to be repeatedly telling me I’m making a huge mistake. But I don’t want tainted money. It isn’t right.
“May I ask why? You do understand the terms of the agreement?”
“Yes. I will never contact Alex again or reciprocate if he attempts to contact me.”
It has happened before. I remember crying in my bed when he stood outside, pleading with me outside my door. That was his first strike against Tatiana.
I don’t hate Tatiana. I don’t think she’s a bad person. I truly think that she will make Alex a good wife. They are both cut from the same cloth.
I am not from his world.
I see that now.
“And yet you don’t want the money?” she says.
“I don’t want the money.” I’ve had this rehearsed speech, but it has blown out of the window, and I’m relying on my raw emotions. “I’m doing this … for him. Because he deserves better than me.”
There’s a pregnant pause.
“You’re a good woman, Elizabeth Turner. I wish we could have met under different circumstances.”
We would probably never have met under different circumstances, I don’t say.
*
The only thing I am taking from Tatiana is my one-way plane ticket back to Chicago and some cab money.
I am a coward. Rather than to go through challenging explanations and teary goodbyes, I decide to write Alex a note. It is early afternoon and Alex is nicely tucked away at work in one of the many companies he heads.
I’ve packed only the clothes I came in. I have left everything else I bought here on Alex’s expense account in the closets of my guest room. Just like taking money from Tatiana, it wouldn’t be right.
I sit down to write the note. My heart is leaden as I move my hand pedantically to scribble the words on the palace notepaper with the embossed Moldavian seal.
… I’m sorry …
… I have decided to go back home because I can’t take the pressure anymore. This is your life, not mine, and I don’t think I can live a day longer in such trying circumstances …
… goodbye. I will always treasure our moments together.
… don’t try to contact me. I will not return this time.
That last hurts the most of all. My tears are rolling down my cheeks and dripping off my chin, and I sign the note with a shaky hand. I seal the envelope and write Alex’s name on it. Then I put it on his pillow – the pillow on his side of the bed in the guest bedroom that we share. Since we’ve come home, Alex has not slept a single night away from my side.
I’m doing the right thing, I convince myself for the hundredth time that day.
I dry my tears by scribbling little goodbye notes to the King, Queen and even Claire, thanking for their kindness in having me as a guest. I place these carefully on my desk where they can be picked up by the maid.