He knew he should resist the temptation, but he couldn't He turned off on the next side road they came to, then left the road to bounce across a meadow for about a mile before he parked beneath a stand of trees.
The mild May night wrapped around them. The moonlight couldn't penetrate the shelter of the trees, and the dark cab of the truck was a warm, safe cave. Pam was a pale, indistinct figure as he reached for her.
She was pliant and eager, yielding to his hands, pressing against him to take more of his kisses. Her firm young body made him feel as if he would explode. Barely aware of what he was doing, Joe shifted and twisted until they were lying on the seat with Pam half beneath him. Soon her breasts were bare, and he heard her strangled intake of breath as he took a nipple into his mouth. Then her nails were digging into his shoulders, and her hips arched.
It was quickly getting out of control. Clothing was opened and pushed aside. Bare skin touched bare skin. Somehow, Pam's jeans were off. But when he slid his hands inside her panties, she whispered, "I've never done this before. Will it hurt?"
Joe groaned aloud, but forced himself to stillness. It took every ounce of willpower he possessed, but he stopped his hands. His body throbbed painfully, and he savagely controlled it. After a long minute he sat up and pulled Pam to a sitting position astride his lap.
"Joe?"
He leaned his forehead against hers. "We can't do it," he murmured regretfully.
"But why?" She moved against him, her body still empty and aching with a need she didn't understand. "Because it would be your first time."
"But I want you!"
"I want you, too." He managed a wry grin. "I guess it's pretty obvious. But your first time—baby, it should be with someone you love. And you don't love me."
"I could," she whispered. "Oh, Joe, I truly could."
He was so frustrated that he could barely control his voice enough to speak, but he managed. "I hope you don't. I'm leaving. I have a chance waiting for me that I'd die before I'd give up."
"And no girl is going to change your mind?"
Joe knew the truth inside him, and he knew Pam wouldn't like it, but he had to be honest with her. "No girl could change my mind. I want to go to the Academy so much that nothing can keep me here."
She caught his hands and shyly brought them up to her breasts. "We could still, you know, do it. No one would know."
"You'd know. And when you fall in love with some guy, you'd regret that your first time wasn't with him. God, Pam, don't make this so hard for me! Slap my face or something." The way her firm young breasts filled his hands made him wonder if he wasn't crazy for passing this up.
She leaned forward and rested her head on his shoulder. He felt the way her body shook as she began to cry, and he folded his arms around her.
"You've always been special to me," she said in a stifled tone. "Do you have to be so darn conscientious?"
"Do you want to take a chance on getting pregnant at sixteen?"
That stopped her tears. She sat up. "Oh. I thought you'd have a—don't all boys carry them?"
"I guess not. And it wouldn't matter if I did have one. I don't want to get involved—not this kind of involved—with you or anyone else, because no matter what, I'm going to the Academy. Besides, you're too young."
She couldn't stop the giggle that burst out. "I'm as old as you are."
"Then we're too young."
"You're not." She sobered and cupped his face in her hands. "You're not young at all, and I guess that's why you stopped. Every other boy I know would have had his jeans off so fast he'd have fabric burns on his legs. But let's make a bargain, okay?"
"What kind of bargain?"
"We'll still be friends, won't we?"
"You know it"
"Then we'll go around together and keep things light. No more messing around like this, because it hurts too much when you stop. You go away to Colorado like you've planned, and I'll take things as they come. I may get married. But if I don't, you come on back here one summer and we'll both be old enough then. Will you be my first lover?"
"It won't keep me in Ruth," he said steadily.
"I don't expect it to. But is it a bargain?"
He accepted that the years could make a difference, and he knew she'd most likely be married. If not—maybe.
"If you still want to then, yeah, it's a bargain."
She held out her hand, and they solemnly shook to seal the deal. Then she kissed him and began putting on her clothes.
Mary was waiting up for him when he got home, an anxious look in her eyes. She got to her feet and tightened the belt of her robe. "Are you okay?" she asked. "Did anything happen?"
"I'm fine. Everything went okay."
Then he saw that the anxious look was really fear. She touched his arm. "You didn't see anyone who—" She stopped, then started again. "No one shot at your truck, or tried to run you off the road?"
"No, it was quiet." They looked at each other for a moment, and Joe realized that Mary had feared the same thing that had occurred to him. More than that, she knew he had decided to take the chance in an effort to draw the rapist out.
He cleared his throat. "Is Dad in bed?"
"No," Wolf said quietly from the doorway. He wore only a pair of jeans. His black eyes were steady. "I wanted to make certain you were okay. This was like watching Daniel walk into the lion's den."
"Well, Daniel made it out okay, didn't he? So did I. It was even fun. The whole class was there."