Bad night, Claire said.
Tell me about it. He cut a sideways look toward her.
Do you think hes right? About them, you know, killing his mother?
I think Shanes carrying around a load of guilt the size of TrumpTower. And I think it helps him to be angry. Michael shrugged. I dont know. Its possible. But I dont think we can know one way or the other.
That feltsick, somehow. No wonder Shane was so reluctant to talk about it. She tried to imagine living with that kind of uncertainty, those memories, and failed.
She was glad she did.
So, Michael said. Ive got about three hours until morning. We need to make some plans about what were going to do, and what were not going to do.
Claire nodded and set a plate aside to dry.
First thing is, none of you leave the house, Michael said. Got it? No school, no work. You stay indoors. I cant protect you if you go outside.
We cant just hide!
We can for a while, and we will. Look, Shanes dad cant run around out there forever. Its a temporary problem. Someones going to find him. The unspoken subject of what would happen to Shanes dad after he was caught was a whole other issue. As long as we dont do anything directly that ties us to whatever his dad does, were okay. Amelies word is good for that.
Youre putting a lot of trust in
A vampire, yeah, I know. Michael shrugged and leaned a hip against the counter, looking down on her. What choices do we have?
Not too many, I guess. Claire studied him more closely. He looked tired. Michael? Are you okay?
Now he looked surprised. Sure. Shanes the one whos got issues. Not me.
No, Michael was all good. Killed, dismembered, buried, rebornyeah, just another day in the life. Claire sighed. Guys, she said mournfully. Michael, Ill stay home today, but I really do have to go to school, you know. Really. Because her missing school was like a caffeine addict going without a daily jolt.
Your education or your life, Claire. Id rather you be alive and a little bit dumber.
She met his eyes squarely. Well, I wouldnt. Ill stay home today. I dont promise about tomorrow.
He smiled, leaned forward, and put a warm sloppy kiss on her forehead. Thats my girl, he said, and left. She sighed again, this time happily, and found herself grinning. Michael might be Eves new main crush, but he was still available as an oh-my-God-how-cute-is-he thrill.
Claire finished the dishes and went back to the living room. The TV was on, tuned to some forensics show, and Shane was slumped on the couch staring at it. No sign of Eve or Michael. Claire hesitated, thinking longingly about bed and forgetting about all this for a while, but Shane just looked soalone.
She went and settled in next to him. She didnt say anything, and neither did he, and after a while his arm went around her and that was all right.
She fell asleep there, braced against his warm body.
It was nice.
Claire supposed that she should have known Shane might have nightmaresbad onesbut shed never really thought about it. When Shane jerked and rolled off the couch, she thumped flat onto the cushions. The TV was still ona flickering confusion of colorand Claire flailed and scrambled for some grasp of what was going on through the fog of interrupted sleep.
Shane?
He was on his side on the floor, shuddering, curled up into a ball. Claire slid down next to him and put her hands on his broad back. Under the thin T-shirt his skin was clammy, and his muscles were as tense as steel cable. He was making these sounds, agonizing gasps that werent quite sobs but werent quite not, either.
She didnt know what to do. Shed felt helpless a lot in the past few hours, but this was worse, somehow, because Michael and Eve were nowhere to be seen, and she wasnt sure if Shane would have wanted them to see him like this. Or if he wanted her to see him like this. Shane was all about the pride.
Im okay, he gasped out. Im okay. Im okay. He didnt sound okay. He sounded scared, and he sounded like a little boy.
He managed to sit up. Claire wrapped her arms around him, hugging him tight, and after a few seconds of resistance she felt him sag against her, and hug her back. His hand stroked her hair as if she might break. Shhh, she whispered to him, the way her mother had whispered it to her when things got bad. Youre here. Youre safe. Youre okay. Because wherever hed been in his dreams, he hadnt been any of those three things.
If she expected him to talk about it, she was disappointed. He pulled back, avoided looking at her, and said, You should go to bed.
Yeah, she agreed. You first.
Cant sleep. Didnt want to, more likely; his eyes were red and blurred with exhaustion. I just need some coffee or something.
Coke?
Whatever.
She fetched it for him, and Shane downed it like a frat boy at a mixer, belched, and shrugged an apology. Wheres Michael? She spread her hands. Eve? She did another silent pantomime of ignorance. Well, at least somebodys getting a good nights sleep. They together?
Claire blinked. Idont know. She hadnt thought about it, actually. She hadnt seen them go, didnt know if theyd gone to separate rooms or if Eve had finally worked up the courage to proposition Michael. Cause hed never make the first move. That just wasnt Michael, somehow.
Christ, I hope so, Shane said. They deserve a little fun, even in hell. He was kidding, but not. He did see Morganville as hell. Claire had to admit, he had a point. It was hell, and they were the lost souls, and it was coming on toward morning and shed been scared for what felt like a very, very long time.
He was watching her closely, in a way that made her feel warmth all over her skin, like a light sunburn.
How about us? she heard herself ask. Dont we deserve a little fun?
I did not just say that.
Only she had.
He smiled. She wondered if the shadows were ever going to leave his eyes again. I could do something fun.