No one—except for Jorie and Ruby—had even cared I’d been gone.
“Poppy?” Jorie called again.
I blinked myself back to reality and noticed that the hallways were nearly empty. “You’d better get to class, Jor.”
She took a step toward me. “Will you be okay, Pops? I’m worried about you.”
I laughed a humorless laugh. “I’ve been through worse.”
I dipped my head and rushed to my class before I could see the sympathy and pity on Jorie’s face. I entered my math class, sliding into my seat just as the teacher began the lesson.
If someone were to ask me later what the class had been about, I wouldn’t have been able to tell them. For fifty minutes all I could think about was the last time I saw Rune. The last time he held me in his arms. The last time he pressed his lips against my lips. How we made love, and the look on his beautiful face as he was driven out of my life.
Idly, I wondered what he looked like now. He was always tall with broad shoulders, well built. But, as for the rest of him, two years was a long time for a person to change at our time of life. I knew that better than anyone.
I wondered if his eyes still appeared crystal blue in the bright sun. I wondered if he still wore his hair long, and I wondered if he still pushed it back every few minutes—that irresistible move that drove all the girls crazy.
And for a brief moment, I let myself wonder if he still thought about me, the girl next door. If he ever wondered what I was doing at any particular moment in time. If he ever thought back to that night. Our night. The most amazing night of my life.
Then dark thoughts hit me hard and fast. The question that made me feel physically sick … had he kissed someone else in the past two years? Had he given anyone his lips, when he’d forever promised them to me?
Or worse: had he made love with another girl?
The shrill call of the school bell tore me from my thoughts. I stood up from my desk, making my way to the hallway. I was thankful it was the end of the school day.
I was tired and I ached. But more than that, I hurt in my heart. Because I knew that Rune would be back in the house next door from tonight, in school the next day, and I wouldn’t be able to speak to him. I wouldn’t be able to touch him or smile at him, like I’d dreamed about doing since the day I didn’t return his calls.
And I wouldn’t be able to kiss him sweetly.
I had to stay away.
My stomach churned when I realized he probably wouldn’t care about me anymore. Not after the way I simply cut him off—no explanation, nothing.
Pushing through the doors into the cool, fresh air, I inhaled deeply. Feeling instantly better, I tucked my hair behind my ears. Now that it was styled into a short bob, it always felt strange. I missed my long hair.
Beginning my walk home, I smiled up at the blue sky and the birds swooping around the tops of the trees. Nature calmed me; it always had.
I had only made it a few hundred yards when I saw Judson’s car, surrounded by Rune’s old friends. Avery was the only girl amongst a crowd of boys. I put my head down and tried to rush past, but she called out my name. I ground to a halt and forced myself to turn in her direction. Avery pushed off from where she had been leaning against the car and stepped forward. Deacon tried to pull her back, but she shrugged off his arm. I saw by her smug expression that she wasn’t going to be kind.
“Have you heard?” she asked, a smile on her pink lips. Avery was beautiful. When I arrived back in town, I couldn’t believe how beautiful she had become. Her make-up was always perfect and her long blond hair was always neatly styled. She was everything a boy would want in a girl, and everything most girls wanted to be.
I pushed my hair back behind my ear, a habit that showed my nerves. “Heard what?” I asked, knowing exactly what she meant.
“About Rune. He’s coming back to Blossom Grove.”
I could see the glint of happiness in her blue eyes. I glanced away, determined to keep my composure, and shook my head. “No, Avery, I hadn’t heard. I haven’t been back long myself.”
I saw Ruby, Deacon’s girlfriend, walking up to the car, Jorie walking beside her. When they saw Avery talking to me, they hurried to join us. I loved them both for this. Only Jorie knew where I’d been for the past couple of years, why I had left. But from the minute I’d returned, Ruby had acted as though I’d never been away. They were true friends, I had realized.
“What’s going on here?” Ruby asked casually, but I could hear the edge of protectiveness in her voice.
“I was asking Poppy if she knew Rune was coming back to Blossom Grove tonight,” Avery replied tartly.
Ruby looked at me curiously.
“I didn’t know,” I told her. Ruby smiled sadly at me.
Deacon walked up behind his girlfriend and put an arm around her shoulders. He flicked his chin at me in greeting. “Hey, Pops.”
“Hey,” I replied.
Deacon turned to Avery. “Ave, Rune hasn’t spoken to Poppy in years, I’ve told you this. She doesn’t even know him anymore. Of course she wouldn’t know he was coming back, why would he even tell her?”
I listened to Deacon and knew he wasn’t being cruel to me. But it didn’t mean that his words didn’t cut as deeply as a spear through the heart. And now I knew; I knew that Rune never spoke of me. It was obvious he and Deacon had remained close. It was obvious to me that I was nothing to him now. That I was never mentioned.
Avery shrugged. “I just wondered, is all. She and Rune were inseparable until he left.”
Taking this as my cue to leave, I waved my hand. “I have to go.” I quickly turned and headed home. I decided to cut through the park that would lead me to the blossom grove. As I walked through the empty grove, the cherry blossom trees bare of their pretty leaves, a sadness filled me.
These bare branches were as empty as I felt. Yearning for the thing that made them complete, but knowing that no matter how much they wished, they couldn’t get them back until spring.
The world simply didn’t work that way.
When I got home, my mama was in the kitchen. Ida and Savannah were sitting at the table doing their homework.
“Hey, baby,” said my mama. I walked over and gave her a hug, holding on to her waist just that little bit tighter than usual.
My mama tilted up my head, a worried look in her tired eyes. “What’s wrong?”
“I’m just tired, Mama. I’m gonna go lie down.”
My mama didn’t let me go. “You sure?” she asked, laying her palm on my forehead, checking my temperature.
“Yeah,” I promised, moving her hand and kissing her cheek.
I made my way to my bedroom. I stared out the window at the Kristiansen house. It was unchanged. No different than the day they had left to return to Oslo.
They hadn’t sold it. Mrs. Kristiansen had told my mama that they knew they’d be back at some point, so they kept it. They loved the neighborhood and loved the house. A housekeeper had cleaned and maintained it every few weeks for two years to make sure it would be ready for their return.
Today, all the curtains were drawn back and the windows were open to let in the fresh air. The housekeeper was clearly preparing it for their imminent arrival. The homecoming that I was dreading.
Drawing the curtains that my daddy put up for me when I returned home a few weeks ago, I lay on my bed and closed my eyes. I hated feeling fatigued all of the time. By nature, I was an active person, viewing sleep as a waste of time when it could be spent out in the world, exploring and making memories.