Olivia hit the call button for the elevator and one arrived almost immediately. She pressed the button for the top floor, sliding the extra key card Alexander had given her months ago into the slot. She gasped when it actually worked. Within a few seconds, the doors opened and she walked out into the reception area in front of Alexander’s office.
His secretary jumped up almost immediately. “Oh, Miss Adler. How are you?” She ran over to Olivia, taking her coat and hanging it up in the closet.
“Fine, thank you. I was wondering if Alexander is around and available. I only need a few moments of his time.”
“Oh, of course. Mr. Burnham had mentioned you might stop by.”
Arrogant bastard, Olivia thought to herself.
“He is in a meeting right now, but has instructed that you are welcome to wait in his office. He should be out within the next ten minutes.” She walked over to the large glass door and buzzed Olivia in.
“Thank you.” Olivia walked down the long corridor leading to Alexander’s office. She heard voices on the opposite side of the hallway coming from the conference room, and stopped dead in her tracks when Alexander’s voice echoed through the room. Could she really go through with this? Just hearing his voice again made her heart ache.
Opening the door to his office, thousands of memories came rushing back. The first night she met him. How he gently took care of her after Simon attacked her. The numerous times during their brief courtship that he summoned her upstairs and all the things they would do on his couch.
She walked over to the sitting area and ran her fingers across the back of the large couch. “A lot of great memories on that couch,” a voice said, interrupting her thoughts. She spun around, her heart dropping to her stomach. Alexander stood in the doorway, wearing a crisp black suit and a green tie.
“Oh my god, Olivia. Are you okay? Is something wrong?” He rushed toward her, wrapping his arms around her, electricity coursing through her body. “Are you sick or something?” Alexander took in the sight of her. She had lost too much weight. He wondered whether she had eaten at all over the past few months. And he felt partly responsible.
Tears fell from her eyes at the concerned sound in his voice. “Why does everyone ask me that?”
Alexander released his hold on her, stepping back to look at her. “Because you don’t look like yourself, Olivia. You look…upset.”
“Well, you could say that,” she replied, glancing around the room, trying to hide her eyes from him.
“Here. Have a seat.” He led her to the love seat across from the couch and helped her sit down before he took his place next to her.
“So, what is it that I can do for you today?” he asked very matter-of-factly. Mr. Businessman was back.
Olivia took a deep breath and straightened her spine, looking for the inner strength to tell him what she had come there to say. “This is kind of hard for me to say so, please, just let me get it all out before you interrupt me.”
“Okay.” He nodded.
“Here goes nothing.” She turned toward him. “Alex, I fucked up. I know that now. I pushed you away because it’s what I do. Or did. I got scared because I was getting so close to you. And I knew that, at some point, you wouldn’t be able to put up with all my craziness anymore. I thought I would never be able to make you truly happy and that killed me. I cared about you so much that I hated myself for doing that to you. So I figured I would push you away, which was the most difficult thing I ever had to do.” She took a deep breath as she stared into his green eyes. “That last morning in Newport…” she said softly.
“On the yacht?” Alexander interrupted, his voice trembling.
“I needed you one more time. I was so addicted to your body, and the thought of never being able to feel you inside of me again broke me apart.”
“So that was you saying good-bye then?” he asked, his eyes meeting hers before she looked away.
“It was the only way I knew how,” she replied, staring at her fingers.
“Look at me, Olivia.”
She obeyed, lifting her water-filled eyes to meet his.
“I knew there was something different that morning, but I never would have guessed that you would be running from me. I had a feeling you were slipping away from me, but I thought we got that spark back after the race. You say you thought I could never be happy with you. That wasn’t your decision to make. I was so deliriously happy with you, Olivia,” he said quietly, his voice full of hurt. “And I knew you were going through some issues. I was more than willing to be patient with you while you worked through those, but you pushed me away. Twice.”
“I know!” she exclaimed, clearly agitated. She took a deep breath. “Just let me finish,” she pleaded.
Alexander nodded. “Okay.”
“When I first arrived in Florida, every morning I woke up hoping, in the back of my mind, that you would show up on my doorstep, begging for me to come back. And then I met Cam and I thought he would be the perfect person to help dull the pain because I felt nothing for him. And nothing was better than the hurt. When you confronted me…god, Alexander. It took all my willpower to not melt into your arms. When you found me, I was secretly thrilled. You’re right. My body did betray me. I’ve never felt as fulfilled or complete as I did with you. You’re the only one that gives me an orgasm so intense that I feel my entire world shake, and it scared me all over again. So I lied. I told you what you needed to hear to leave me alone.”
Olivia stared into Alexander’s intense green eyes, tears beginning to fall down both their faces. “I’m so sorry, Alexander. I took the coward’s way out. I pushed you away to prevent myself from being hurt. But, in the end, I was the one who hurt myself. I experienced inexplicable pain. And then I saw all those photos of you with another woman and heard about your engagement, and I shut down. I tried to shut everything off. Because that pain, Alex…” her voice trailed off, her chin trembling. She took another steadying breath. “That pain is worse than anything I have ever experienced. Knowing that you’re with someone else is tearing me apart.” Tears continued to fall down Olivia’s face.
Alexander took a deep breath, trying to compose himself. Olivia had come back to him. It was what he always hoped for and wanted. But now that she was here, could he really dive head-first back into her life? “Olivia, do you have any idea how hurt I was when you left? Do you have any idea what the words you said in Florida did to me?”