“No. I guess he changed his mind after he killed you.”
A point in the bastard’s favor.
“You have to stay in Dallas, can’t get a paying job and must be home by midnight. What other hoops does your father have you jumping through?”
She laid aside her lobster fork. “I don’t want to talk about him. He’s barely been gone two months. And it’s…difficult to discuss his last wishes.”
The tone of her voice hinted at anger more than grief which only lengthened the list of questions Lucas had about this whole setup. Something wasn’t right in this equation and he wouldn’t rest until he figured out what was out of kilter.
He wanted to press for details. He needed to know what he was up against. His focus in recent months had been on the Singapore deal and his recon work on KCL had been done before Everett died. The shift in power could alter his strategy. But he would have to bide his time. Pushing Nadia too hard and too fast for information could alienate her.
If he’d learned nothing else since his accident, it was that his mother’s words were true.
Patience was indeed a virtue.
Waiting for the right moment to strike often meant the difference between taking a loss and making the deal of a lifetime.
Nadia found having a man fiddle with her wiring a strangely intimate experience even from thirty feet away. That could be because she couldn’t peel her gaze away from the very nice rear end bent over her entertainment cabinet.
“That should do it,” Lucas said as he stepped away from her flat panel television. “We should be able to get the webcam feed on the big screen.”
“Thank you. But you don’t have to stay. I know how much men hate weddings.”
“I’ll stay in case you have problems with the connection.”
As much as she appreciated that, she’d really rather be alone. She didn’t expect the next hour to be easy. Weddings never were for her.
But she’d only done one video conference before and the last time Mitch had sent a team of geeks to Dallas to set it up for her. She’d paid attention to the process, but that had been a two-way feed and this was only a one-way deal. It might be different.
The watch-only format left her feeling a little disconnected, but it was better than nothing. She shook off the negative feelings. “How is it you know all this electronic wizardry?”
“I do a lot of my board meetings via video conferencing.”
“Why not in person?”
“Like you, I can’t always be there.” He activated the TV remote then hit a series of keys on her computer—quite competently she noted. Within seconds a jostling image of a candlelit church sanctuary filled the screen.
Her cell phone rang. Caller ID said Rand. “Hi, big brother.”
Rand’s face entered the picture. “We’re live. Check to see if you’re getting the audio and video.”
He spoke directly into the camera. His voice came through the phone and then, after a slight delay, through the TV speakers. The echoey feel was slightly disorienting.
“I’m getting picture and sound.” Her oldest brother looked happier than she’d ever seen him. There was a smile in his eyes.
“I want you to say hello to someone.” Rand reached out and wrestled the camera away from the person holding it and then swung it around, leaving Nadia with a room-spinning, carnival ride sensation.
Tara Anthony, a woman who’d been not only Nadia’s father’s PA but also Nadia’s best friend five years ago smiled into the lens. Tara’s cheeks were flushed, her blond curls upswept. Rand and Tara’s love affair had been another casualty of their father’s manipulations and their reunion had come about as a result of his will requiring them to work together. That circumstance had been the main reason Nadia had jumped to the conclusion that her father was trying to reunite her with Lucas.
Wrong.
Tara put Rand’s phone to her ear and waved. An engagement ring winked on her finger.
“Hi, Nadia. I wish you were here, but I’ll do my best as camera person to make sure you’re as close to the action as you can get.”
“Thank you.” An ache filled Nadia’s stomach and rose like a hot-air balloon to block her throat. She wanted to stand beside her brother when he took his vows the way Rand and Mitch had been there for her. “Why didn’t Mitch spring for a professional videographer?”
“Your brothers discussed it and decided not to risk a media circus if news of the wedding leaked out. I’m experienced with a camera, so I volunteered.”
“Almost showtime,” she heard Rand say.
Nadia sank onto the arm of the sofa, her gaze riveted to the screen as Rand panned the camera away from Tara and over the small gathering of guests.
“Nadia, I’m going to hang up now,” Tara said into the phone. “We’ll talk later. I want to catch up.”
“Okay. Bye, Tara.” Nadia closed her phone.
An organ struck a chord and blasted through the TV speakers in surround sound. “There’s my cue, Rand,” Tara said. “Give me the camera. Go stand by your brother and do your best-man thing.”
The picture jiggled as Tara took the camera back. Nadia’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. Tara had given an order and Rand, second only to their father on the bossy scale, had followed it. Love must indeed have magical powers.
The camera focused on the closed doors at the back of the church. The music swelled and the doors swung open. Seconds later a dark-haired toddler pelted down the aisle as fast as his little arms and legs would churn. He clutched a small white pillow in his fist.
Rhett. Her little brother.
Nadia hurt as if someone had stabbed an ice pick into her chest. She took a jagged breath. Children always had that effect on her, but this one…this one looked enough like her that he could have been hers. She put a fist to her stomach. Her son would have been ten now.
The camera tracked the galloping child to the front of the church then zoomed in on a kneeling, grinning Mitch. Her brother caught the little boy against his chest and hugged him tightly.
“Good job, buddy,” she heard Mitch say. Mitch rose with Rhett in his arms, took the pillow with the glistening wedding bands tied on top and passed it to Rand. Then her big, tough, serious older brother planted a kiss on the fuzzy dark head before handing the boy off to a sixtyish woman Nadia didn’t recognize.
The next shot framed both of her brothers, Rand standing beside Mitch. Each of them looked happy and relaxed—so different from their forbidding faces at her wedding. Yes, they’d been there to offer support—or pick up the pieces if she’d changed her mind—but they hadn’t been cheerful about it. They’d merely been doing their familial duty. Something her father had refused to do.
Mitch’s gaze shifted down the aisle. The camera followed and focused on the slender brunette floating toward him with a blinding smile. Carly, Rhett’s aunt and soon to be Nadia’s sister-in-law. Nadia recognized the lines of the simple ivory Vera Wang dress. Instead of a veil, a ring of flowers intertwined with pearls circled Carly’s head. Her face glowed with love, and when the camera panned back to Mitch, the emotion in his expression punched a sob up Nadia’s throat.
She was happy for him. Truly, truly happy. But this was something she’d never have.
Love.
Another wedding.
Children.
Her eyes burned. A tear spilled over and burned a path down her cheek. Blinking furiously, she ducked her head and swiped it away, hoping Lucas didn’t see. An arm encircled her shoulders. Startled, she looked up. Lucas’s blue eyes trained on her face, offering silent support.
They’d once been that happy couple, the one with so much love in their eyes and their hearts that they hadn’t seen anyone in the church but each other.
When she looked at him now, she could see remnants of that man and all she could think was, what a waste and how could I have been so wrong about him?
Lucas had thrown their love away for money. Sure, her father had contributed to the death of their feelings with his meddling, but if Lucas had truly loved her, he would have refused the money. He would have believed in her and her ability to live the vows she’d spoken. In the end, Lucas Stone was the only one to blame for that final blow of the ax.
She shrugged off his arm, hugged her empty, aching middle and fought back a sob. If she’d been alone, she’d probably be crying like a baby.
Her life would have been so different if, in her moment of selfishness, she hadn’t distracted him and caused the accident.
Or would it have been?
Would he have betrayed her anyway? But if they hadn’t wrecked, even if he’d eventually dumped her, she would have at least had their son and maybe other children for comfort.
Nadia dragged herself out of the well of what-ifs and forced her gaze back to the TV. Tara zoomed in tight on the bride and groom as they took their vows and exchanged rings.
Nadia pressed her trembling lips so tightly together they grew numb. She thumbed her bare ring finger. She’d refused to remove her wedding band for years. Her father had harangued her about it endlessly. The day she’d decided she would never love again, never marry again was the day she’d finally taken off the plain gold band with hers and Lucas’s names engraved inside and shoved it into the back of her jewelry armoire.
And that’s where it would stay. Forever.
She would never have it all. Never even attempt it. Because she couldn’t trust her judgment and she couldn’t risk ending up like her mother and hurting or abandoning those who’d loved her. All she could have was her career, her volunteer work and superficial affairs with men she couldn’t love.
Men she couldn’t love.
The phrase reverberated through her mind like a cry echoing off the Grand Canyon’s walls.
Men like Lucas who were more interested in her money than her heart.
Her pulse quickened. Her skin tingled. The fine hairs on her body rose as excitement raced through her.
Her gaze returned to the man beside her. Her husband. The man who had selfishly taken everything precious to her and crushed it. Her chance for happiness. Her love. And more recently, her confidence in her ability to judge others.
Did she dare take what she needed from him? Could she use her soon-to-be ex for mindless physical pleasure and then walk away at the end of her year in exile?
Walk away. Exactly as he’d done to her.
Taboo.
Wrong.
Tempting. Oh, so very tempting.
Seven
“R eady for your chocolate cake and the rest of the champagne?”
Lucas’s voice behind her sent a prickle of awareness down Nadia’s spine. He’d left her apartment and returned to his immediately after the ceremony ended. Nadia had continued watching as Tara, acting like a TV reporter, led her through the wedding guests to introduce Nadia to Carly, her new sister-in-law, Carly’s parents and finally, Rhett, that adorable, beautiful, perfect little boy.
Ignoring the familiar emptiness, Nadia finished shutting down the computer and turned off the TV. She rose and faced Lucas. He carried a tray holding the cake and ice bucket containing the champagne.