“That’s it, angel,” he encouraged hoarsely, his erection still as hard as if he hadn’t just had a teeth-grinding cli**x.
His arms fell to his sides. His hands fisted in the comforter. His biceps clenched and flexed with his movements. His abs tightened every time I took him to the hilt, the rigid lacing of muscles glistening with sweat. His body was a well-oiled machine and I was taking it to its limits.
He let me. Gave himself to me.
Undulating my hips, I took my pleasure, moaning his name. My core clenched rhythmically, another orgasm rushing up too quickly. I faltered, my senses overwhelmed.
“Please,” I gasped. “Gideon, please.”
He caught me by the nape and waist, and slid down until we were flat on the bed. Pinning me tightly, he held me immobile, thrusting upward … over and over … shafting my sex with fast, powerful lunges. The friction of his thick penis rubbing and surging was too much. I jolted violently and came again, my fingers clawing into his sides.
Shuddering, Gideon followed me over, his arms tightening until I could barely breathe. His harsh exhalations were the air that filled my burning lungs. I was utterly possessed, completely defenseless.
“God, Eva.” He buried his face in my throat. “Need you. I need you so much.”
“Baby.” I held him close. Still afraid to let go.
BLINKING up at the ceiling, I realized I’d fallen asleep. Then the panic hit, the horrible inevitability of waking from a blissful dream into a nightmare reality. I surged up, gulping air into a chest that was too tight.
Gideon.
I nearly sobbed when I found him sprawled next to me, his lips barely parted with his deep, even breathing. The lover my heart had broken for, returned to me.
God …
Sinking back against the headboard, I forced myself to relax, to savor the rare pleasure of watching him sleep. His face was transformed when he was unguarded, reminding me of how young he really was. That was easy to forget when he was awake and radiating the powerful force of will that had literally knocked me on my ass when I’d first met him.
With reverent fingers, I brushed the inky strands of hair away from his cheek, noting the new lines around his eyes and mouth. I’d also noted that he’d grown leaner. Our separation had taken a toll on him, but he’d hidden it so well. Or maybe I viewed him as flawless and inviolate.
I hadn’t been able to hide my devastation at all. I’d believed we were over and it showed to everyone who’d looked at me, which Gideon had counted on all along. Plausible deniability, he’d called it. I called it hell, and until we could stop pretending we’d broken up, I’d still be living in it.
Shifting carefully, I propped my head on my hand and studied the decadent man who graced my bed. His arms were wrapped around his pillow, showing off chiseled biceps and a muscular back adorned with scratches and crescent marks from my nails. I’d gripped his ass, too, insanely turned on by the feel of it clenching and releasing as he f**ked me tirelessly, stroking his long, thick c*ck deep inside me.
Again and again …
My legs shifted restlessly, my body stirring with renewed hunger. For all his polished urbanity, Gideon was an untamed animal behind closed doors, a lover who bared me to the soul every time he made love to me. I had no defenses against him when he was touching me, helpless to resist the drugging pleasure of spreading my thighs for such a virile, passionate male—
His eyes opened, stunning me with those vivid blue irises. He gave me a lazily seductive once-over that made my heart skip a beat. “Hmm … You’re wearing the fuck-me look,” he drawled.
“And that would be because you’re so extremely fuckable,” I shot back. “Waking up to you is like … presents on Christmas morning.”
His mouth curved. “For your convenience, I’m already unwrapped. Batteries not required.”
My chest tightened with terrible yearning. I loved him too much. I was constantly worried that I wouldn’t be able to hold on to him. He was lightning in a bottle, a dream I tried to hold in my hands.
I let out a shaky breath. “You’re a delicious extravagance for a woman, you know. A luscious, mouthwatering—”
“Shut up.” He rolled over and dragged me under him before I knew his intent. “I’m filthy rich, but you just want me for my body.”
I looked up at him, admiring the way his dark hair framed that extraordinary face. “I want the heart inside the body.”
“You have it.” His arms tucked against my sides and his legs tangled with mine, the coarse hair on his calves stimulating my hypersensitive skin.
I was restrained. Possessed. His warm, hard body felt so good against mine. I sighed, feeling some of the fearful hesitation easing.
“I shouldn’t have fallen asleep,” he said quietly.
I stroked his hair, knowing he was right, that his nightmares and atypical sexual parasomnia made sleeping with him dangerous. He sometimes lashed out in his sleep, and if I was too close, I took the brunt of the simmering rage inside him. “I’m glad you did, though.”
He caught my wrist and pulled my fingers to his mouth for a kiss. “We need time together when we aren’t looking over our shoulders.”
“Oh, God. I almost forgot. Deanna Johnson was here tonight.” The moment the words left my mouth I regretted the wall they put up between us.
Gideon blinked, and in that split second, the warmth in his eyes was gone. “Stay away from her. She’s a reporter.”
My arms slid around him. “She’s going for blood.”
“She’ll have to get in line.”
“Why is she so interested? She’s a freelancer. No one assigned her to you.”
“Drop it, Eva.”
His dismissal of the subject irked me. “I know you f**ked her.”
“No, you don’t. And what you should be focused on is the fact that I’m about to f**k you.”
Certainty settled in my gut. I released him, pulling away. “You lied.”
He reared back as if I’d slapped him. “I have never lied to you.”
“You told me you’ve had more sex since you met me than you’ve had in the last two years combined, but you told Dr. Petersen you’ve been getting laid twice a week. Which is it?”
Rolling to his back, he scowled at the ceiling. “Do we have to do this now? Tonight?”
His body language was so tight and defensive that my irritation with his evasiveness left me in a rush. I didn’t want to fight with him, especially over the past. What mattered was now and the future. I had to trust that he’d be faithful.
“No, we don’t,” I said softly, turning onto my side and reaching over to place my hand on his chest. Once the sun came up, we’d be right back to pretending we weren’t together. I had no idea how long we’d have to keep up the charade or when I’d get to be with him again. “I just wanted to warn you that she’s digging. Watch out for her.”
“Dr. Petersen asked about sexual encounters, Eva,” he said flatly, “which isn’t necessarily f**king, as far as I’m concerned. I didn’t think that distinction would be appreciated when answering the question. So let me be clear: I took women to the hotel, but I didn’t always nail them. It was the exception when I did.”
I thought of his f**k pad, a stocked-with-sexual-paraphernalia suite reserved in one of his many hospitality properties. He’d given it up, thank God, but I’d never forget it. “Maybe it’s better I don’t hear any more.”
“You opened this door,” he snapped. “We’re walking through it.”
I sighed. “Fair enough.”
“There were times when I couldn’t stand to be alone with myself, but I didn’t want to talk. I didn’t want to even think, let alone feel anything. I needed the distraction of focusing on someone else, and using my dick was too much involvement. Can you understand that?”
Sadly, I could, recalling times when I’d dropped to my knees for a guy just to shut off my brain for a while. Encounters like those had never been about foreplay or sex.
“So is she one of the girls you screwed or not?” I hated asking the question, but we had to get it out of the way.
He turned his head to look at me. “Once.”
“Must’ve been some lay for her to be so bent out of shape over it.”
“I couldn’t say,” he muttered. “I don’t remember.”
“Were you drunk?”
“No. Jesus.” He scrubbed at his face. “What the hell did she tell you?”
“Nothing personal. She did mention you having a ‘dark side.’ I’m assuming that’s a sexual reference, but I didn’t ask her for details. She was playing it like we had an affinity because we’d both been thrown over by you. The ‘Dumped by Gideon Sisterhood.’ ”
He glanced at me with cold eyes. “Don’t be catty. It doesn’t suit you.”
“Hey.” I frowned. “I’m sorry. I wasn’t trying to be a total bitch. Just a little one. I think I’m entitled, all things considered.”
“What the hell was I supposed to do, Eva? I didn’t know you existed.” Gideon’s voice deepened, roughened. “If I’d known you were out there, I would’ve hunted you down. I wouldn’t have waited a second to find you. But I didn’t know, and I settled for less. So did you. We both wasted ourselves on the wrong people.”
“Yeah, we did. Dumbasses.”
There was a pause. “Are you pissed?”
“No, I’m good.”
He stared.
I laughed. “You were getting ready to fight, weren’t you? We can play it that way if you want. Personally, I was hoping to get laid again.”
Gideon slid over me. The look on his face, the melding of relief and gratitude, caused a sharp pain in my chest. I was reminded of how important it was for him to be trusted to share the truth.
“You’re different,” he said, touching my face.
Of course I was. The man I loved had killed for me. A lot of things became inconsequential after a sacrifice like that.
3
“ANGEL.”
I smelled the coffee before I opened my eyes. “Gideon?”
“Hmm?”
“If it’s not at least seven o’clock, I’m going to kick your ass.”
His soft laugh made my toes curl. “It’s early, but we need to talk.”
“Yeah?” I opened one eye, then the other, so I could fully admire his three-piece suit. He looked so edible, I wanted to take it off him—with my teeth.
He settled on the edge of my bed, the embodiment of temptation. “I want to make sure we’re solid before I leave.”
I sat up and leaned against the headboard, making no effort to cover my br**sts because we were going to end up talking about his ex-fiancée. I played dirty when warranted. “I’ll need that coffee for this conversation.”
Gideon handed me the mug, then stroked the pad of his thumb over my nipple. “So beautiful,” he murmured. “Every inch of you.”
“Are you trying to distract me?”
“You’re distracting me. Very effectively.”
Could he possibly be as infatuated with my looks and body as I was with his? The thought made me smile.
“I missed your smile, angel.”
“I know the feeling.” Every time I’d seen him and he hadn’t gifted me with his smile had been another cut to my heart until I’d been bleeding nonstop. I couldn’t even think of those occasions without feeling echoes of the pain. “Where did you hide the suit, ace? I know it wasn’t in your pocket.”
With a change of clothes, he’d transformed himself into a powerful, successful businessman. The suit was bespoke, and his shirt and tie were immaculately matched. Even his cuff links gleamed with understated elegance. Still, the fall of dark hair that skimmed his collar warned others he was far from tamed.
“That’s one of the things we need to talk about.” He straightened, but the warmth in his gaze remained. “I took over the apartment next door. We’ll have to make our reconciliation seem suitably gradual, so I’ll keep up the appearance of using my penthouse for the most part, but I’ll be spending as much time as possible as your new neighbor.”
“Is it safe?”
“I’m not a suspect, Eva. I’m not even a person of interest. My alibi is airtight, and I have no known motive. We’re just showing the detectives some respect by not insulting their intelligence. We’re making it easy for them to justify their conclusion that they’re at a dead end.”
I took a sip of coffee, giving me time to contemplate what he’d said. The danger might not be immediate, but it was inherent in his guilt. I felt the pressure of it, no matter how he tried to reassure me.
But we were working our way back to each other, and I sensed his need for reassurance that we were going to recover from the strain and separation of the last few weeks.
I deliberately took a light tone when I replied, “So my former boyfriend will be on Fifth Avenue, but I’ve got a hunky new neighbor to play with? This could be interesting.”
One of his brows arched. “You want to role-play, angel?”
“I want to keep you satisfied,” I admitted with brutal honesty. “I want to be everything you ever found in the other women you’ve been with.” Women he’d taken to a f**k pad with toys.
His irises were cool blue fire, but his voice came smooth and even. “I can’t keep my hands off you. That should be enough to tell you I don’t need more.”
I watched him stand. He took my mug and set it on the nightstand, then caught the edge of the sheet and threw it deftly aside, exposing me completely.
“Scoot down,” he ordered. “Spread your legs.”