I blinked. Several times. “He chose me over Celia. Even when he thought that I’d gone all crazy again. That’s…that’s big.”
“Yes! It’s big! It’s huge!” She hit the table so hard the knife went flying to the floor. Ignoring it. she pinned me with her eyes. “Now what are you going to do to match that?”
I stood, needing to pace the room. “Okay.” I ran my hands through the hair that had fallen from my ponytail. “I’ll go to Japan.”
A sound somewhere between a shriek and a gasp filled the room. The startling part was that it came from me. Did I really just say I’d go to Japan to surprise Hudson? Oh my god I did and I didn’t even want to take it back.
Mira jumped up with a squeal. “Yes!”
“It’s Sunday, right?” In my mind I was already packing, making a mental list of preparations. “I can’t leave until tonight. Someone’s renting out the club and I’m scheduled to get them set up. I could leave right after that though. Like eight or so.”
“That’s perfect.”
I stopped pacing. “This is going to sound ridiculous, but I don’t even know how to travel out of the country. I’ve been to Canada once. That’s the extent of my foreign travel.”
“I’ll take care of everything,” Mira said, laughing. “Do you have a passport?”
I nodded. “Hudson got me one. He left it on the nightstand. Do you need it?”
“No, you need it. Make sure you bring it with you.” Her eyes were moving like she was making her own mental list. “Do you have a credit card for The Sky Launch?”
“Yep.” I ran—actually ran—to the foyer where I’d dropped my purse.
“Here you go,” I said when I returned, handing her the American Express I carried for business expenses related to the club.
“Yay!” Mira pulled me in for a hug that I actually didn’t mind. “This is so exciting! I always wanted a sister! You guys will make the most beautiful babies.”
“Hey, slow down.” That made the hug come to a quick end. “No one said anything about…” I put my palms to my face. “I can’t even finish that sentence.”
“Sorry. I’m an optimist.”
I dropped my hands and pointed a finger at her. “Keep your optimism to yourself from now on, okay?”
She rolled her eyes. “Okay.” But she was twitching like she had more to say. “I mean, not okay. I have to know because I’m ultra nosy—do you want that stuff? You know, kids, marriage. The whole package.” She bit her lip. “With Hudson.”
I didn’t know what to say. The answer was tricky and the conversation already had me breaking out in a sweat. “Here’s the thing, Mira.” I still didn’t know what I was going to say. Then the truth spilled out. “I used to want it so bad that I thought every guy was the whole package, that every guy was The One. And I’d do everything to make them believe the same about me. I mean everything. Not so good things.”
A breath shuddered through my lungs. “So now I can’t even let myself think about it, not even to daydream for a few seconds or to test it out and see how it feels. So the answer is don’t ask me that. I can’t.” My voice cracked so I said it again. “I just can’t.”
Mira didn’t even blink. “Then don’t. I daydream about it enough for both of us.”
“Thank you,” I said.
“You’re welcome.” She smiled. Then she shooed me with her hands. “Now get packing, girl! We’ve got to get you to Japan!”
Chapter Twenty-One
“Should I change or stay in this?” It was the third time I’d asked Liesl this question in the last fifteen minutes. She’d answered each and every time, but I couldn’t remember what she’d said—my mind was a mess of exhaustion and nervousness. I’d managed to nab a short nap in between packing and figured I’d catch up on the rest during the long flight. Until then, I had espresso.
Liesl spun on her barstool and grabbed my shoulders, looking me directly in the eye. “Laynie, chill the f**k out. You’re making me insane.”
“Okay.” A thumping noise drew our eyes downward. It was the heel of my shoe, bouncing with the twitching of my leg. I put my hand on my thigh to still the movement. “Okay. Chilling.”
“Thank god.” She ran her eyes again over my short wraparound skirt and white button down blouse. “You look smokin’. But you should change into sweats for the flight so you can be all comfy and drool while you sleep and all that. Then change back into this in the airport bathroom.”
“Okay.” That’s right. That was the plan. I would have been in sweats already except that I was waiting for the club renter to show up.
Though I had plans to change the hours of The Sky Launch, we currently weren’t open on Sundays or Mondays. Occasionally a private party would rent the place for various functions. I didn’t know much about this particular rental situation. David had set it up. He would have handled the exchange too, except he’d left for Atlantic City after we’d closed that morning to check out Adora on the sly. I hated to admit it, but Hudson had made David’s life by giving him that job. It had been a good move.
Liesl turned back to the bar where she was creating some sort of counter artwork with olive spears. “Do you know where you’re going when you land?”
“Mira arranged for a car to pick me up and take me to his hotel.” Anxiousness pulsed through me again and I started pacing. “But what if he’s not there? What if I have to wait or what if I miss him? Or what if….” my stomach lurched at this thought, “what if he’s with someone?”
“He won’t be with anyone. He’s with you.”
“But how do you know?”
“I…” She paused as if she were going to say something and then changed to something else. “Just do.”
I scowled. That answer wasn’t satisfying.
“What? Are we in grade school?” She sighed. “I can tell by the way he looks at you. Everyone can. Come on, Laynie, he asked you to move in with him. After what? A week? He’s into you, girl.”
“All right, all right. You’re right.” I glanced at the clock above the bar. “The renters are supposed to be here in twenty. We should go down in case they get here early.”