Home > Breathe into Me(59)

Breathe into Me(59)
Author: Sara Fawkes

There was no way I was going to go that far. I just wanted to be happy. The sex with Kane was not what had been making me happy. It was just him, but that had been a lie, so I needed to move on.

I hopped up from the bed and looked at Jessi. “I’m going to get ready. Then we are going to go out and do something fun. Sitting in the dorm room will not help matters any, and why should I have to hide away? I didn’t fuck up. He did.”

Jessi stood and hugged me. “Atta girl! You get ready. I will go get us some coffee, then we will go get manis and pedis.” She grabbed her purse and headed toward the door. With her hand on the knob, she paused. “I’m really glad you are not going to let this get you down, Kels. I’m glad to finally have some of the old you back, and I’m not ready to lose her again.”

I smiled at Jessi and she continued on her way to get our coffees, and started getting ready for—another—fresh start.

Jessi and I had spent the first part of the day getting manis, pedis, and massages. It felt so good to have someone rub all the sorrow away from my body that it had been feeling the night before. Walking out of the spa that day, I felt like a new person. I could do this. I could be happy without Kane.

Now that all our problems had been rubbed and soothed out of us, we were left with limited options for what to do with the rest of our night. The town our college was in wasn’t all that big, so the things we could do were sort of limited. The only thing we knew was we wanted to go dancing, but the only place we could do that was Shot’s. I had known that Kane’s schedule had him off tonight because we were supposed to go out. So I at least knew he wouldn’t be working as a bouncer, but that didn’t mean he wouldn’t be there.

Jessi had said that she would drive as far as we needed to, to go to a place to dance, but there was no point. I couldn’t avoid Kane forever. We went to the same school. Our best friends were dating. It was better to just rip the Band-Aid off now and just get that first time being in the same vicinity over with.

We went straight from the spa to Shot’s. Landon was helping his parents with something for the night, so it would just be Jessi and me. Just like it always had been. When we approached the door, Jerry gave me a knowing look. I know he had seen me run out last night even though he had made not attempts to stop me or talk to me. He also didn’t bring it up as we walked past him and into Shot’s.

We made our way to the bar where Jessi ordered double shots of Patrón that we tossed back as soon as they were set in front of us. I welcomed the burning sensation the alcohol provided as it went down.

“Woo,” I said, shaking my head back and forth. “It’s been a while.”

“I know right?!” she shouted back. “You are going to have so much fun tonight, Kels. I just know it. Now”—she said clapping her hands together—“let’s get out there and find you some hot piece of tail to play with,” she said, pulling on my hand and dragging me toward the dance floor.

With the alcohol from the shot, I felt my body loosening up more than it already had been. All I really wanted to do was dance. I wanted to lose myself in the beat of a good song. A new Kelly Clarkson was blasting, and the lights were flashing and I let my body flow to the beat.

I felt someone come up behind me and begin to dance with me. My body automatically stiffened, and I turned to tell the person to back the fuck off because I really didn’t want to be pawed at tonight. I wanted to dance by myself and just not have any worries. When I turned to tell the person dancing with me to get lost, I found a familiar set of blue eyes.

“Nate,” I breathed a sigh of relief. I was so thankful it had not been some random stranger. I looked over at Jessi who signaled to me that she was going to go to the bathroom. I nodded at her to let her know I was okay and she began weaving her way through the crowd.

“Hey, Kelsey. Good to see you. It feels like since we finished our project you have been avoiding me.” He leaned down and said into my ear.

“Yeah, I know. I’m sorry. I had just thought to myself last night that I should call you and see if you wanted to meet up for coffee sometime this week. But then some stuff went down and I never got around to it.”

I did truly feel bad at the way I had dropped Nate. He was one of the first people I had met when I started school here, and he had been the one to try to warn me about Kane. Though at times, Nate’s attitude had come off a little strange, or jealous of, Kane, he had been right in the end.

“We are friends, Nate. I’m sorry I have been so distant lately.”

Nate smiled at me before leaning down to my ear to speak, “It’s fine, Kelsey. I know we are friends. You have a boyfriend and a life. You can’t be worrying about spending time with me.”

I was shaking my head before he could even finish what he was saying. “One, I don’t have a boyfriend … anymore. Two, even though I had a boyfriend, that does not excuse dropping everyone in my life.”

Nate pulled back to look at me, a puzzled look on his face. “You are Kane are no longer together?”

I shook my head. It hurt worse than I’d thought it would to admit it to someone other than myself. “No. You were right. I didn’t know the real Kane.”

He gave me a sad smile before taking my hand in his. “I’m sorry, Kelsey. I didn’t want to be right about that. I didn’t want to see you hurt. But it’s probably for the best that it ended as soon as it did before you let yourself fall too much for him.”

Little did he know I had fallen to the bottom with Kane, and it was going to be a hard climb back to the top, but I would get there.

Nate smiled before he spoke again. “You know what? You still owe me a dance.”

I owed him a dance? I looked at him confused.

“You remember. The night you wore that amazing pink dress? You promised me a dance and then left before I could get it from you.”

I thought back to that night. He was right. I was so worked up over Kane that night that I had forgotten about even talking to Nate. What a bitch he must have thought I was.

“Look, I know things just went sour with you and Kane, but maybe this is what you need. A good night out with some good friends.” He gave me his million-dollar smile, and I smiled back.

“That is exactly what tonight is about. So I would love to dance with you, Nate.”

Nate pulled my body closer to his and while I was genuinely happy to have a friend like Nate to dance with, I wasn’t sure how I was going to react to all this. Kane was the only person I had ever been this close to, but since Nate was a close friend, I was going with it and hoping for the best.

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