“Jonas?” I asked.
“Babe –” he started but I ripped my wrists from his hold and went back to my bag, dropping to my knees in front of it.
“Fuck you, Tate,” I snapped, yanking the zip on my bag even though it was caught in a t-shirt I hadn’t tucked in. “God!” I cried, shaking my head. “What is the matter with me? How do I get messed up with this kind of shit?”
“Lauren, calm down and come into the bedroom so we can talk,” Tate ordered.
I shook my head, still struggling with the zip. “Oh no. No way. You’ve had your chance to talk. You’ve had plenty of opportunity to tell me you have a son. A son with that… that…” my head whipped back and I looked him in the eye, “that woman.”
“Ace, listen to me –”
I shot up to my feet and rounded on him. “I went to bed naked, Tate. I never sleep naked. I don’t like to sleep naked. It isn’t comfortable. And I did that for you.” I stabbed a finger toward him then threw up both my hands. “God, what a fool! I should have known. You,” I thrust a finger at him again, “want me? What the f**k was I thinking?”
“Lauren –”
“An old, fat, sorry-assed bitch,” I hurled his words at him. “That’d work, Tate. Good call, honey. At least that old, fat, sorry-assed bitch would work when paraded in front of a judge as a show you could give a stable home to Jonas!”
One second he was standing in the door, the next second I was pinned against the back wall of the closet. He’d moved so fast, and I’d retreated so automatically, I didn’t even know how I got there. I just felt the wall against my back and Tate was deep in my space. I felt that energy coming from him, so strong it was a flood and it enveloped me so tight it felt like there was no oxygen in the air to breathe. His body wasn’t hostile, not like he was with Neeta, but it was aggressive in a way that I had absolutely no choice but to pay attention.
“That’s the last time you get to throw that in my face,” he whispered and even his voice scared the shit out of me.
I sucked in breath and, in doing so, tried to suck in courage. “Step back, Tate. I’m leaving.”
“You have nothin’ to do with Jonas.” He was still whispering.
“Step back,” I demanded.
His face came to within an inch of mine. “Not one f**kin’ thing.”
“Right,” I shot back, my tone filled with sarcasm.
“She promised me she was leavin’ him,” he said. “She promised me she’d come home, bring my boy home, we’d start over, she’d get her shit together, we’d have a life, a family.” I made no response but that didn’t matter, Tate kept talking. “But she showed and she was supposed to bring Jonas. She didn’t. She just wanted to get off. She likes to get off. She likes to suck cock. Her man, he drinks so much, his dick is so limp, it’s been so long since he used it for more than to take a piss it’s a wonder it hasn’t fallen off. She came back not to make a family, she promised that shit just to get my cock. Just to get off. Christ, Lauren, this woman is raising my son.”
“Tate, step –”
“I was through with her before. We’d been fightin’ this battle for ten years. Broken promises from her which led to us bein’ in and outta court for control of Jonas. Her ass**le of a husband would lose another job or lose another game of cards and back in court we’d go, not for custody, for more support so I could prop up her and that dickless husband of hers. Jonas can’t suffer so what do I do, Lauren? What do I do?”
“Tate –”
“I give more, he drinks it or gambles it, she snorts it or smokes it, Christ, who knows?” Tate bit out. “I gotta juggle everything so I don’t miss a weekend with him. Twice a month I get to see him. That is, twice a month until that night, when she showed up at the hotel room, I got inside and my son wasn’t there and I knew her game. I knew, no matter how sweet she could tell her lies, she’d played me again and used my kid to do it. So that was it and she knew it. We didn’t fight. I told her to get her shit sorted because my attorney would be in touch. She tried to play me again but I was done. You don’t use my kid against me, not for a f**kin’ orgasm, for f**k’s sake.”
“Tate, I –”
“I haven’t seen him in two months, Lauren. Your shit, Tonia’s shit, needin’ to work so I can pay my bills and keep my kid fed because neither of those two do jack. I haven’t seen my boy.”
“I’m sorry, but –”
“I get home, that scene goes down and you… what? I don’t even know what the f**k you’re on about.”
“I know why you’re with me,” I told him.
“Yeah, babe? And why’s that?”
“I…” I took in a breath then started again. “I don’t have any kids but that sounds awful, Tate. I’m sorry about that, it sounds… I’m sorry about it. And I can understand why you’d do anything you could to get Jonas but you can’t act like Neeta. You can’t play someone else to take care of your son.”
His head tipped to the side. “Act like Neeta?”
“To make a home for your son. Make a family. Make something a judge would look at favorably and use me to do it.”
His brows snapped together under narrowed eyes.
“Use you to do it?” he repeated.
“Yes,” I stated. “That’s why you’re with me. A man like you… a woman like me.” I shook my head and whispered, “I didn’t get it but I get it now.”
“Tell me you’re shittin’ me,” he demanded.
“Sorry?” I asked.
He moved quickly and he did this to pound the side of his fist on the wall by my head.
He got in my face and shouted, “Tell me you’re shittin’ me!”
I jumped with the fist action and went still at his shouting in my face then I shouted back, “No Tate! I am not shitting you! I get it! You can stop…” I got up on my toes and got into his face too, “fucking… playing me!”
He took a step back and then I was in the air. I blinked at his back in surprise and realized I was over his shoulder as he turned and stalked to the door of the closet.
“What on –?”
“Shut it,” he growled.
“Tate, put me down!” I shouted, putting my hands to his waist and pushing as my feet kicked and he rounded the bed.