Ashley relaxed back into the sofa and smiled. She really did like him...maybe she'd be okay with liking a dead man? "What did you need to talk about, then? It sounded pretty urgent."
I sat back in the sofa as well, regarding her for a moment. Her half brows were scrunched together as she went through a list of options in her head, as to what might be going on. I was pretty sure she wasn't anywhere near the truth. Finally, I spoke softly to her, "Do you remember when I told you that Teren only had so long to have children?"
Her face scrunched as far as the scars allowed, as she thought about that. "You said he'd be sterile soon." Her face brightened momentarily. "Are you pregnant?"
I reflexively put a hand over my stomach and swallowed back the sudden tears. "No...not yet." She shook her head, still looking confused. Taking a deep breath, I continued. "Teren is..." I racked my brain for another way to say it...a less harsh way. I didn't come up with one and spilled it to her, the same way he spilled it to me. "He's dying."
Her hand flew to her mouth and her eyes instantly watered. I cringed that she was having the same "permanent dead" thoughts that I'd had. As she started to respond to me, I quickly added, "Just the human side of him. He'll still be a vampire. He'll still be walking around, and talking and joining us for meals. He just won't be breathing or have a heartbeat or...actually be eating with us."
Her eyes widened as far as they could and her hand dropped to her lap. "You're gonna date a vampire."
I grinned at her. "I am dating a vampire, Ash."
She shook her head. "Not really...I mean, he drinks cappuccinos."
I started laughing uncontrollably as my fear mixed with my remembered amusement. I'd said that exact same thing to him once. Confused but entertained by me, Ashley started laughing as well. I was wiping tears from my eyes before I finally came down from my mini-high. She'd stopped laughing first and was giving me a very serious look.
"So...he can't have children, because he'll be dead?" I nodded and she sighed and hugged me. I melted into that embrace and savored someone finally comforting me for what dating a vampire had thrust onto my life. I knew the changes were happening to him...but sometimes, I just needed someone to hug me, and say that everything was going to be okay.
Ashley patted my back and did just that. Tears of sadness started to form, as the next thing I had to tell her took me over. They spilled down my cheeks as Ashley pulled away from me. She wiped off a few drops as I brokenly told her, "He's leaving, Ash."
Her eyes watered as she whispered, "What?"
I shook my head, irritated at my own dramatics, and explained. "It's not safe for him to be around people when he changes, so he's going to go live at his parents' ranch for a month or so." More tears slid down my cheeks, as more dramatics slid from my mouth, "I'm going to miss him so much."
She ran a hand down my shoulder. "But a baby..."
She let her thought trail off and, annoyed at the way I was explaining this, I angrily brushed away my tears. "I'm just being an overly dramatic girl," I muttered. Her face twisted into confusion again. I let out a slow, even breath, trying to rein in my emotions before I continued. "I'm going to visit him at the ranch every night. I'll still see him and we're still going to try." I rolled my eyes. "I'm just being emotional."
She put her arm around my shoulder and pulled me tight. "You have a lot on your plate. You're allowed." I relaxed into her side and relished the comfort of her closeness. She continued in a whisper, "What do you mean, it's not safe for him to be here?"
I cringed and closed my eyes before responding to her. She probably wasn't going to like this. "He would most likely kill someone, if he was too close to a human after the change."
Her hand dropped off my shoulder and she scooted away to look at me. "What?" Her tone had dropped a full octave, as what I'd said flooded her thoughts. I knew she liked Teren but, well, even I had difficulty with this part of it.
I reached for her arm to try and mollify her. "It's okay. He won't hurt anyone. It's just a greater risk if he stays."
Her eyes were huge with panic now. "Emma...you shouldn't be around him." Her gaze crisscrossed over my body, and I was really grateful that she couldn't see his latest feeding frenzy. "You shouldn't let him bite you."
She backed away from me and I scooted closer to her. "He won't hurt me, Ash, I'm safe." Wow, in trying to reassure my sister, I was suddenly starting to sound exactly like Teren. Maybe if we both repeated that phrase often enough, it might actually start sounding true.
Ashley stood up and put her hands on her hips. The brown hair that beautifully framed her face, was now framing an irritated face. My sister normally kept her cool, but we were sisters, and at times her temper could be a match for mine. It must be genetic. "Let me try and understand what you're saying." She put a hand to her forehead like she suddenly had a headache. "He is about to die..." She looked at me intently. "Like what? Have a heart attack or something?" I nodded at her correct guess.
She started to walk back and forth in front of the couch. Pacing must also be genetic. "Okay, so he's going to have a heart attack and he isn't going to make it. His heart will give out and what makes him like us will die." She looked over at me for confirmation and I nodded again, wisely keeping my mouth shut while she processed her thoughts. "Then, when he's all cold and heartbeatless and...dead..." She stopped walking and stared at me blankly. "He's going to rise from the grave and start ripping the throats out of innocent San Franciscans?"
I frowned at her harsh portrait. "No..." I looked away as I considered what about that wasn't true. Unfortunately, there was really only one part. "He wouldn't make it to a grave. We think he'll change over within an hour." I returned my eyes to her re-startled face. "Maybe less."
She fell back down onto the sofa with me. "Oh my God, Emma...oh my God."
I patted her knee in reassurance, both hers and mine. "We've fixed this. I've finally convinced him that I can't get him to the ranch in time, and so he's going to spend the last couple months of his life there...around lots and lots of yummy cattle."
Her expression shifted from shock to irritation. "He wanted you to take him there?"
Oops. Perhaps I shouldn't have mentioned his crazy plan, since we had a new one in place. I swallowed and answered slowly, "Yes...but..."
She cut me off as her voice heated. "He wanted you to drive him there? He wanted you to be alone in the car with him, when he woke up all crazed and starving?" Her face was definitely red now. She abruptly stood and made for the door.
"Where are you going?" I asked, confused.
With her hand on the knob, she looked back at me and indicated through the door to the outside. "I'm going over to his house...so I can stake him."
I twisted my lips at her. Yeah, definitely shouldn't have mentioned that part. Her anger was practically swirling in the air now. "Would you stop it, and come here and sit back down." She huffed for a minute and I really thought she was going to leave. I patted the seat beside me and, very grudgingly, she removed her hand from the door and returned to my side. Crossing her scarred arms over her chest, she let out a heavy sigh. I patted her knee again. "He thought he had more time, Ash. He thought he'd be out of it for hours, and I could get him there and get away, with plenty of time to spare."
I looked back at the front door and pictured my vampire, all alone at his house, possibly wondering if we were still okay. My lips curled into a smile as I realized that we were okay. Everything was going to be fine. "We thought he had more time." I looked back at her, the smile still on my lips. "But we see now, that he doesn't have that kind of time so we're fixing the problem. Everything will be fine, Ashley."
I ran a hand down her hair and she relaxed as she looked at me. I could see in her face that her momentary anger had dwindled back down to the calm and reasoned Ashley. "Would he really be able to resist eating you after the change? Can you still date him, that way?"
I smiled and nodded. "It will only be bad when he first wakes up...then he'll be fine. Then he'll be my Teren again." My voice was calm and soft and free of any trouble, like my body suddenly felt.
Ashley was still unsure. "Why when he wakes up? Shouldn't he be less inclined to...to...eat people, after such an ordeal?"
I smiled and told her my biggest fear, aside from him killing me, of course. "His body will be starving...beyond starving, I'd say." I put a hand on her knee and rubbed it a little; the scarring on her knee cap was apparent, even through the fabric of her khaki slacks. "If he doesn't eat right away...he will die...permanently."
Ashley stared at me with a stunned expression. I looked over her face and smiled at my own remembered expression. Shocked into speechlessness was probably a better way to handle the news than yelling at the potential in-laws. Finally, tears filled her eyes and spilled down her cheeks. She gave me a fierce hug. "I'm sorry, Emma...I didn't know."
I hugged her back, no longer needing the comfort, but greatly appreciating the sentiment. "I know, Ash. Nobody knows."
She pulled back and another tear followed the first. She put a hand to my dry cheek. "You must be so lonely...dealing with all this by yourself."
I swallowed and shook my head. "Well, I'm not anymore. I have you."
She let out a small laugh and held me again. I closed my eyes and breathed out a long exhale. Fear was so much easier to digest, when you didn't have to do it alone. It felt so good to share.
We conversed about more mundane topics for the rest of the evening. Before leaving for the night, she gave me a swift hug at the door and told me I could call her anytime if I needed to talk about it...and to tell her when it did happen. With moist eyes, I told her I would, and that I'd see her tomorrow for dinner with Mom.
As I watched her stumble a bit on the steps down to my driveway, I thought again about Teren changing her...and dismissed it. He was right, she was happy. Maybe someday she would bring the topic up to Teren, if it occurred to her, but it wasn't my decision to make for her. I wasn't the one that had to live her life. And she was living it, she was doing just fine.
Tuesday morning, I awoke from a dream about Teren changing in the middle of dinner tonight. In the dream, the change had been nearly instantaneous and he'd popped his fangs out after slumping at the table for a mere three seconds. Then he'd viciously smiled at my mom and ripped her neck wide open. Blood had spurted everywhere, just like in some gory Tarantino film. He'd been moving on to my sister, his face streaked with Mom's blood, when I'd woken up, screaming. I was pretty sure that wasn't going to happen tonight, but the dream had been terrifying, and it only reaffirmed our decision of him spending the last part of his humanity away from other humans...away from me.
With a heavy sigh, I got ready for my day. Later at work, seeing Tracey's happy, love-crazy face only deepened my sigh. I shouldn't be jealous of her. She had taken much longer than most to get to this stage. But I was only human, and her carefree relationship was a little grating at the moment. I was actually happy when Clarice gave me an assignment that kept me down in the records room for most of the afternoon.